Dear Diary,

Today my mad scientist friend accidentally sent me to 1985 in her time-traveling Corvette…

Why are there so many dishes?
How did it get this way?
Good thing nobody is visiting or they might not want to stay.
Why are there so many dishes?
Don’t they know there’s other work to do?

Having to change a diaper during work hours (unless your job is to change diapers in which case…carry on) and not even getting hazard pay for it…. Carrying out duties for two full time jobs simultaneously. No pun intended with the duties….. Having to prepare everyone’s meals and then on top of it being verbally accosted for cutting someone’s food in the wrong shape; squares apparently taste different than triangles.

I got to work today and immediately people started complaining that they were hungry. I offered to get them something to eat in our shared kitchen and even hand delivered it; don’t worry, I washed my hands first and threw it to them from six feet away.

It only took two weeks – that’s right – TWO WEEKS of social distancing for the freshwater dolphins to return to the park. Two weeks of reduced pollution, two weeks of reduced human activity, two weeks to find their homes back in our park. Scientist have already said there’s been a drop in seismic noise which contributes to their return.